For those of you who read my column, you may have stumbled across my first article on here on dating in the middle ages, a.k.a. dating when you are middle aged. I want to find myself a best friend and life partner. Once you hit a certain age, that is much easier said than done. You see, I'm kind of picky. But as a friend pointed out a few weeks ago, I need to relax a few of my rules and regulations and just give the guys a chance! (Thanks Mike).
So I signed up with Magnetix Dating Agency and Julie Clitheroe became my personal matchmaker; something I obviously needed help with. Apparently, my picker is off. I'm not saying this to be hard on myself; it is simply the truth.
In order to be fair, I went to an online dating site to see what I could find on my own. The last few months have gone like this…
I met with Julie, gave her my information and my list of what I was looking for and what I did not want. It took about the same amount of time to type all the information, fill out questionnaires, and add some photos to my online profile. The difference was I didn't have a sounding board to clarify things and give me feedback. It was just me at the keyboard hoping what I wrote would attract someone into my life.
Then came the sifting and searching. The first week I read through hours and hours of profiles, looked at several hundred photos of fish, dogs, horses, houses, motorcycles, sunsets, children and grandchildren, blank photos and the odd picture that actually had the man shown. Most of those were taken from a distance, with hats and sunglasses and of course the seemingly obligatory dog, fish, or other woman in the shot. I quit after finding 10 possible suitors.
The next week I went back and re-read the profiles. Half of them, although my age, were looking for someone 15-20 years younger. Apparently becoming a father at 50 plus is in vogue. That left five, so I sent off an email to introduce myself. Three replied. Not bad odds, but so far I'd spent about 27 hours online and not had so much as a coffee date.
By then Julie had sent me photos and a brief description of two gentlemen. I went out for coffee with each of them, had lovely conversations, and realized I was not what they were looking for and visa versa.
Meanwhile back online I was still in the communication stage of getting to know my possible future dates. It's amazing how many online daters prefer to stay online for a long time. Personally, I like to meet when there is still something left to find out about each other. Eventually I did go on two dates, met two nice men, and discovered we weren't right for each other. You could say we flunked chemistry.
Julie sent me two other matches and I went to meet each of them. Each one was one step closer to what I wanted and the beauty of dealing with Julie directly was I could tell her what I liked about each one, thereby giving her the information needed to find an even better match for me.
Total time invested with an online dating site - approximately 38 hours. Total time invested with Magnetix - approximately six hours and that included four dates!
My time is valuable and I am content to leave the matchmaking to Julie and Magnetix so I can concentrate on my work, family and friends. Stay tuned gentle reader, I've yet to connect with my best friend, but keep the faith, and I'll keep you posted.